Self-Compassion assists the inner journey
The twenty-minute
“TEDx” talk is so clear on the well-researched benefits of practicing a
self-compassion, called “The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self Compassion” by Dr Kristin Neff.
This short YouTube video is learning the difference between self-esteem
and self-compassion.
Do you give yourself self-compassion? The
three elements are: “Self-Kindness, Common Humanity, and Mindfulness.” I am
always intrigued by how to do things, the why often I see comes later. So how
does self-compassion help me build warrior
love?
I want to relate to myself with
self-kindness, especially going through this parting of two searching souls.
Writing this book is being kind and warm to myself, it’s not just being
critical of me! With self-compassion, I can integrate the thoughts and feelings
that what is happening is very human. I do know in my heart that my sufferings
are a common experience throughout humanity and so it’s not just happening to me alone! I don’t have to hide and just
go into feeling a ‘bad’ person! I can go out and connect to others. Next, I
want to learn “Mindfulness.” This is taking a balanced approach to my feelings;
neither to exaggerate nor deny my negative emotions of self-criticism.
The critical belief of “I must not be lazy”
If I beat myself up continually, I just leave
the planet early without learning unconditional love. I can get lost in my own
pain. I want to consciously learn to be kind to me. When I criticize myself I
am threatening and attacking myself. I become the threat and the threatened.
The fight-flight response kicks in. My stress response shuts my immune system
down and I can become ill and depressed. The old negative belief that I need to
be self-critical comes from a protestant belief: work hard and harder—so I
won’t be lazy. This can lead to exhaustion! So I affirm:
“I
wisely build self-compassion by meditating regularly which helps me learn and
be open and receptive to learning the next step for personal growth.”
I choose love even when life is tough so
self-compassion can give the deep genuine experience to feel safe. I begin to
think what I truly need from the heart of my mind. I need to tap into warmth
and soft vocalizations of genuine positive affirmations. When I feel safe I choose to meditate
and respond with wisdom and compassion for others who are close to me, yet
knowing I need self-compassion. So I repeatedly choose to tap into nurturing
myself. I do yoga and juice with good organic ingredients. I eat regularly and
keep fit, watch a funny film. I put on my rich soul music (as you will see
throughout this book) dance wild or soft and let grief flow. I send gentle
blessings of love to all whom maybe critical of me at this time. I see and
think clearly and let self-compassion facilitate positive change. I write my
story with self-compassion. One beautiful way of attracting self-compassion is
to choose carefully whom I share my pain with. Today the right person came to
listen and just let me cry.
Some of the ingredients for choosing love,
especially when life is tough, and so learning Warrior Love, are the following:
· To be willing to learn the lessons
from what I have attracted.
· To take full responsibility, yet
building in shame resilience.
· To admit my lies with little ego
or excuses.
· To look at my possible negative
addictions.
· To be willing to do the mental
work moment-by-moment and meditate regularly.
· To free any pent up fear energy
with safe ways of expressing anger or old anger, resentment.
· To read and listen regularly to
positive audio information.
· Cry laugh and open my heart to
attracting the right people to assist me on a tough inner and outer journey.
· Write and look at where in my past
life the emotional patterns and beliefs emerged, so I can change and grow
positively.
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