A little story for Christmas!

The Smuggler

Every day, Mustafa took his straw-laden donkey across the border. But one day, he was stopped by a customs officer, who eyed him suspiciously.

“What have you got in that straw?” he asked. “Are you carrying any contraband goods across the border? If you are, you’ll have to pay a fee.”

“Look for yourself,” replied Mustafa. “I’m hiding nothing!” The customs officer poked about and found nothing.

This went on, day after day. Sometimes he would look in the donkey’s mouth, even under the tail! Nevertheless, the customs officer vowed he would never stop searching.

This went on for ten years, and the customs officer retired. However, the ex-officer thought one day he might have been smuggling gold dust in the donkey’s fur.

One day he was walking through the market and he saw a familiar face. It was Mustafa without his donkey. “Hey you! Come here! Aren’t you the man with the donkey laden with straw?”

“Yes I am,” replied Mustafa.

“And you were smuggling weren’t you? I am convinced you were. I searched you every day but I couldn’t find anything, because you were very crafty. But you can tell me now. Were you smuggling?”

“Yes I was!”

“I knew it! What were you smuggling?”

“Donkeys!” said Mustafa with a big smile.

LEARNING TO LOVE

At home in the UK, I begin the day by sending, a text—a positive affirmation each day—to a hundred people or more. It’s a lovely action that inspires me. Now being abroad, I give a positive affirmation to myself from Louise Hay’s pack of Wisdom Cards. The card says, “I can heal myself on all levels!” And on the reverse side it says: “Healing means to make whole and to accept all parts of myself, not just parts I like, but all of me.” How appropriate. And then I open her book, You Can Heal Your Life to a random page and read: “My life doesn’t work.” I am reminded how I used to wake up saying, “My body, finances, and relationships don’t work!”

Now I have manifested a beautiful villa with a magnificent view of a winding snake-like road between sun-scorched mountains and the sea. I can hear goats—their bells are ringing. And I can hear dogs barking. The most precious gift is time to think and write this book, away from all family and friends. It is my retreat to all my earthly senses and with the unseen inspiration calling me and guiding me. Let me dive in the deep end. As Dr. Deborah Anapol wrote, “Love is its own law.”

I accept love is a mystery and most people want love.

Here is what I have learned over years as I have grown to like and gradually love me and life, that I call warrior love.

·      I have confidence in my ability to communicate to a whole range of people. They often share their secrets and their willingness (and resistance) to love themselves.

·      I am learning to be giver as well as a receiver of love, with a high degree of compassion and self-compassion.

·      I do my best not to judge or gossip. The effect of gossip is so destructive; when I see myself do it, I do my best to stop.

·      I am a person learning to have pleasure, including sex, without shame.

·      I am allowing others to love me in deep platonic friendships. This was one of the most difficult changes, because I never thought or felt loveable.

·      I am learning to take back my power to earn good money doing work I love. I realize now how important this is toward building self-esteem, self-worth, and self-love.

·      I am learning to say positive affirmations in the mirror about my mind and body and soul, including my sexuality. I love playing audio principles of success daily, especially when I find myself reverting to old negative habits.

·      I am learning to follow my intuition by meditating.

·      I am willing to learn from teachers who cross my path.

·      I am learning to turn my negative beliefs into positive affirmations: An example:
“I am open and receptive to all good!”
“I am safe.”
“I release the need to be right.”
“I am at peace. I love and approve of myself.”

·      I am learning, gradually, to let people know who is behind the masked, hurt adult and releasing the “genius” child. I believe this genius is in all of us—when we choose to love ourselves by developing a nurturing inner parent! A parent that loves us, even when we make mistakes—especially while we learn. This makes warrior love a reality.

·      I am willing to let go with love, relationships that constantly criticize and try to control me through guilt. I ask myself: What in me attracted this experience? I take responsibility to do some work to change and heal me.

·      I am learning gradually to tell the truth by courageously owning my story.

·      I realize that, as I learn to love myself, I can forgive myself, especially when I take responsibility for my mistakes.

·      When I look into a real mirror or a metaphorical mirror that reflects what I have attracted to me in experiences, I can now learn patience and believe myself when I say, “I love you, Roger, even when you make mistakes.” I am learning to be patient—not an easy family pattern to change. So often I have wanted to jump a whole series of lessons, because my ego wanted everything now without doing the work.

·      Most importantly, I ask people I have hurt to forgive me, and I ask this with authenticity.

·      I am learning that, when I invite the source of love to help me, even the toughest experiences are transformed into healing.

·      I am learning to handle anger, jealousy, guilt, shame, and grief, and see each of these emotional states as an opportunity to learn.

·      I am learning the difference between man-made laws of love and natural laws of love.

·      I see more clearly that to have a real relationship with another, I need a shared life purpose and similar spiritual values.

·      I am learning what I need in a relationship. This is an emotional resonance of appreciation for self and each other based on being true to self and the other person. Then criticism is so rare, and each day can be full of love and happiness.

·      If the relationship is built just on sexual attraction, and an unwillingness to truly love one’s true self, then the relationship with self and anyone else is a co-creation of unhappiness.

·      I am willing to live on my own and be happy rather than accommodate fear, guilt, shame, and resentment from another.

Giving your love from the heart!

Learning to give and receive from the heart

I have often given away my services cheaply. I have asked people to pay me when they have made leaps in self-esteem or, with their new consciousness, so in turn help someone else who might need their assistance. Often I received financial help, and I had no way of paying back the money. I hope I have passed on this kindness later. This, I believe, is how life works in a more truly caring culture. Yet, as I said earlier, all of this undermined my own self-worth and my partner’s opinion of me.

I have received such abundant finances through my father-in-law, and from my father and one sister, which I am so grateful for. Their help has allowed me to give my time and energy and skill to so many people. I was always grateful to my mother-in-law for suggesting, “Roger, you could build a special garden hut and use it as a place to meet your clients.” Thank you … may your spirit be free and happy.

That hut has attracted and heard such long stories from deeply frightened personalities, and I have been privileged to guide and witness deep and authentic positive healing.

Insight: Abuse in one generation does not have to pass onto the next generation and down the family tree. It can stop when people learn they are full of love, and not hate. However, this is a challenge we face today, right now. This little book is part of that offering. Imagine if all dictators had been loved and had been able to trust in their formative years. I don’t believe they would come out from childhood projecting all their rage onto ethnic minorities or any group. I ask you, what would happen if all potential dictators and despotic leaders of gangs and tribes had learned to love themselves and had been taught love rather than hate and fear? What would our world be like? You might think that is so simplistic. Well, I have seen such positive changes in men who could be, and indeed were, so cruel to life.

Imagine in schools that we were taught why and how to love ourselves. What would our world be like?

HEART LOVE VS ANXIOUS FEAR

Warrior love, in a rapidly changing world, is for all granddaughters, grandsons and future generations. May they know that what we do now, in learning to love who we are, helps everyone to grow in a world that is safe for future humans to love each other. It is dedicated to warriors of love like Nelson Mandela and Aung San Suu Kyi. And to all unseen warriors of love.

What we do now with our thoughts, beliefs and actions, is vital in laying foundations to create a truly loveable world. Our willingness to move from fear to love, I believe, can create a safe earth and a much safer, spiritual, loving and loveable race called human beings. Warrior love is one agreement that says: The more we each choose to love the miracle we are, the more this enhances new types of love relationships for future generations to live more peacefully and richly on planet earth.

I want this little book to assist a process of growth where we can be free energetically and emotionally like a 2 to 4 year old, yet balanced like an authentically growing wise spiritual adult!

It is dedicated to Antoine De Saint–Exupery, “The Little Prince” in us all, where; “One must look with the heart” and become a ‘warrior of heart love’, even when life throws us tough experiences!

LOVE Quotes from WARRIOR LOVE

Sondra Ray: “One definition of love is ultimate self-approval.  If you love yourself, you will automatically give others the opportunity to love you.”

Deborah Anapol: “Love is inherently free. It cannot be bought, sold, or traded.” This beautiful soul passed on to the next life a few weeks ago!

      Or as Paulo Coelho puts it, “In love lies the seed of our growth.  The more we love, the closer we are to the spiritual experience.”

David Deida: “Giving Love-to the point of recognizing existence as love—is the purpose of your life.

Don Miquel Ruiz: “Become impeccable with your word. Don’t take things personally, don’t make assumptions and always do your best … And know each time you break these agreements you can start again.”

Robert Holden adds, “Love is about everything … When you make love your purpose, you are fulfilling your destiny.”

Fred Lehrman states, “The Immortal Relationship will be real for you to the extent that you can let go of two fundamental lies about your existence which you may have accepted at your birth: first, that love comes from outside of you; second, that you need love to survive. What is true is this: You are love, and nothing can kill you.”

Brene Brown: “I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.”

Masaru Emoto: “Water secretly holds two energies: one of love and one of gratitude.”

Love of Love

Can we learn a new emotional language that really loves love? That is expansive rather than restrictive of our wholehearted way of being? I realize these are tough questions. I know we could make a safer world in which we could love ourselves and each other if we got the negative nonsense of our past conditioning out of the way. Could we learn how our ego so often defeats us in how expansive and deep love can be? Could we learn and truly experience Deborah Anapol’s Seven Laws of Love? These are:

1.     Love Is Its Own Law

2.     The Law of Source

3.     The Law of Attraction

4.     The Law of Truth

5.     The Law of Unity

6.     The Law of Consciousness

7.     The Law of Forgiveness

This book is so refreshing and could save so many loving relationships from ending poorly—or could we choose to keep love alive in all types of relationships.

Here is a quote from The Prophet by Kahil Gibran:

Speak to us of pleasure.

Pleasure is a freedom-song.

But it is not freedom.

It is the blossoming of your desires …

It is the caged taking wing … Ay in very truth, pleasure is a freedom song.

 … And some of your elders remember pleasures with regret like wrongs committed in drunkenness …

They should remember their pleasures with gratitude, as they would the harvest of a summer.

It finishes, “People of Orphalese, be in your pleasure like the flowers and the bees.” 

Time To Think

Nancy Kline opens our minds to see and think more clearly in her books:

 TIME TO THINK & MORE TIME TO THINK.

I just want to recommend these two books to my readers. They will enhance your life in ways of communicating with self and others that I believe brings out the best in all parties.

It is rare that a person can bring so much deep experience to help people open their minds to new ways of thinking, relating and truly listening with appreciation.

My love Roger

Children Love to be loved by parents who love themselves!

Children love to be loved by adults who love themselves from a place of deep personal integrity.

Imagine that our children are mentored in strong self-esteem, warrior love, from year one, by parents and teachers who love who they are; experiencing self-love, especially at school and other places of learning. This would be such an exciting adventure for young minds. Children love to be listened to about all subjects, especially learning to love self without shame and guilt. I believe bullying and early abuse dissolves together with wise boundaries of self-love and self-knowledge. I see warrior love being taught in schools and through college life and even in businesses and government organizations. Warrior love includes teachings that serve our rich humanity—not just cramming knowledge.

In my vision, men and women of all generations dissolve their “secret lives” that come from stories of pain, and alchemize it with becoming “brave” with truth. We learn Toltec wisdom from teachers like Don Miquel Ruiz:

To be impeccable with our word; where we no longer take things personally; we no longer make assumptions; and we always do our best.

IMAGINE WARRIOR LOVE!

Children love to be loved by adults who love themselves from a place of deep personal integrity.

Imagine that our children are mentored in strong self-esteem, warrior love, from year one, by parents and teachers who love who they are; experiencing self-love, especially at school and other places of learning. This would be such an exciting adventure for young minds. Children love to be listened to about all subjects, especially learning to love self without shame and guilt. I believe bullying and early abuse dissolves together with wise boundaries of self-love and self-knowledge. I see warrior love being taught in schools and through college life and even in businesses and government organizations. Warrior love includes teachings that serve our rich humanity—not just cramming knowledge.

In my vision, men and women of all generations dissolve their “secret lives” that come from stories of pain, and alchemize it with becoming “brave” with truth. We learn Toltec wisdom from teachers like Don Miquel Ruiz:

To be impeccable with our word; where we no longer take things personally; we no longer make assumptions; and we always do our best.

Our healing energies increase moment by moment as we create new beliefs and agreements that assist right-action to heal the “dream” of this wounded earth. We create a culture that mentors and shares what helps to create loving relationships with self and others. This information, with practice and will power, becomes a priority for each of us to learn. Enlightened women, men, and children become our authentic warrior guides and we learn to trust each other through trusting our inner power of warrior love.

Forgiveness and letting go blame, by men and women, becomes our hallmark of regaining trust. No longer do we stay victims with a harsh judge. We become dream masters. We become truly responsible by being intuitively wild and free. Self-love opens us to a key that opens our heart; our story is shared with “brave vulnerable truth.” We choose to love and become warrior love – even when life is tough.

Money becomes a transaction of abundant love. There is only one world – no third world!  Feminine energy is wisely integrated into business and all transactions. Co-operation of skill and knowledge opens new avenues of sustainable methods of living.

Religions no longer compete for our minds. Each soul is a priestess or priest. Life is seen and experienced as an exciting school that unfolds with delightful surprises. People’s minds, bodies, and souls, wake up from being negatively domesticated. When we become aware that we are not free, we take right action to be truly free from a virus of self-destruction. Chaos becomes a true heaven on earth.

Families, communities and countries co-operate. Manipulation through guilt, resentment, criticism, jealousy and fear are dissolved by being constantly connected to the power of spiritual and sexual healing energies within each of us. We learn to wake every day with gratitude and practice the gentle art of blessing. As we build gratitude we attract prosperity of every kind: Friends, time, good health, and wisdom.

Instead of being victims, warrior love assists people inside work organizations to free their hearts and attract work they love. Humans share with a warrior heart to become brave and truthful with all that they think, say, and do.

As we embrace warrior love we create a paradigm shift of consciousness to live an enlightened life that creates miracles of healing whenever needed. We no longer survive; we live our love energy in the now.

Change is healthy, as we become open and receptive to being truthful to our partners and ourselves. “Time to Think” with friendly thoughts and beliefs in our minds is natural.  People listen to themselves and each other with love, forgiveness, and appreciation. We make real advances in being truthful about our spiritual and sexual desires. Our “earth guide only” (ego) is loved in such a way that it moves us from fear to authentic love. We don’t fight our ego, we dissolve its fear around our death. Because we realize we never die, we just transmute into spirit of a higher vibration of love.

Governments and religious leaders of countries are made up of people who love life and new agreements are made with consciousness and easily kept. Ageing reverses, worry is dissolved, and we realize we could live for an average of 200 years and move onto the next training ground with ease. Our words, thoughts and actions are creative when connected with meditation, prayer and disciplined warrior action. We speak and sing a new language of heartfelt affirmations. This gives the Source clear and wise messages that we are “ready” to be totally connected to the power of being at one with Source.

Humans choose to dissolve the parasite of fear that comes from the negative mass media and many other sources. Our whole drama of false beliefs and negative agreements are seen and transformed through actions of intense warrior love. Our impeccable word “hovers over the water” and we give thanks from our infinite heart of love and healthy love returns multiplied. And so it is.

Contentment

Contentment is a vital ingredient of wise love. Here’s a story by Anthony De Mello, a Catholic priest who had a great way of making things simple out of what seemed complex philosophical ideas:

The Contented Fisherman

A rich man on holiday by the seaside came across a fisherman sitting beside his boat, smoking his pipe and drinking a cup of tea. “Why aren’t you out fishing in your fine boat? It’s a fine day and you could catch plenty of fish. You’re just wasting valuable time sitting here idly like this,” said the wealthy traveler.

“I’ve caught enough fish for today. Why do I need any more?” asked the fisherman.

“Well, more fish means more profit. You could sell your excess fish in the market, and after a while you would have enough money to buy yourself some bigger nets. That would allow you to catch even more fish. Then you could maybe buy a second boat and hire more men to work for you. Perhaps in ten years’ time you might have a big house, nice clothes, and a lot of money in the bank,” said the rich man, sticking out his chest.

“And what would I do then?”

“Then you’d really be able to take it easy and enjoy life!”

“What do you think I’m doing now?” asked the fisherman as he took another drink from his cup.

GOOD HEALTH

Everything in my experience, especially in relationships, is a mirror of the mental pattern that is going on inside me! When I lie to myself, it hurts and creates more lies. Until I confront those half-truths and come clean, I hide my true talents, and my ego stops my ability to love life.

—Roger

     When I facilitated HEAL YOUR LIFE sessions I witnessed people’s mental and spiritual hearts expanding with forgiveness and truly owning their family emotional patterns that have hindered awareness of the inner miracle of their lives. To hide our miracle of love is such a waste of energy. The music of their souls shines great healing to each other. As trust grows, I do less teaching and let their “heart wisdom” begin to open new doors of opportunity. I just give thanks for the process that unravels each person’s unique healing. Sometimes I am asked, “What is good health?” Then I remember, word for word, the following quote from Heart Thoughts, by Louise Hay:

Good health

Is having no fatigue,

Having a good appetite,

Going to sleep and awakening easily,

Having a good memory.

Having good humor

Having precision in thought and action,

and being honest, humble, grateful and loving.

How healthy are you?

Well, I still have work to do; the real difference now is that I enjoy the journey even when it gets tough! Perhaps the title of my next book will be Divine Mind Willing.

TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE!

Be your “self”

Many of us feel we live in a society that often wants to control us and make us think the same as everyone else, so that we “fit in”. Yet my spirit is unique, just as yours is unique. Here’s a fitting story by Leo Buscaglia called Educated Insolence:

The animals got together in the forest one day and decided to start a school. There was a rabbit, a bird, a squirrel, a fish, and an eel, and they formed a Board of Education. The rabbit insisted that running be in the curriculum. The bird insisted that flying be in the curriculum. The fish insisted that swimming be in the curriculum, and the squirrel insisted that perpendicular tree climbing be in the curriculum. They put all of these things together and wrote a Curriculum Guide.

Then they insisted that all of the animals take all of the subjects. Although the rabbit was getting A in running, perpendicular tree climbing was a real problem for him; he kept falling over backwards. Pretty soon he got to be brain damaged and he couldn’t run any more. He found that instead of making an A in running he was making a C, and of course he always made an F in perpendicular tree climbing.

The bird was really beautiful at flying, but when it came to burrowing in the ground, he couldn’t do so well. He kept breaking his beak and wings. Pretty soon he was making a C at flying as well as an F in burrowing, and he had a bad time with perpendicular tree climbing.

The moral of the story is that the person who was best of the class was a mentally retarded eel who did everything in a halfway fashion. But the educators were all happy because everybody was taking all of the subjects and it was called broad-based education.

I invite you to respect the fact that we are all so different—valuing freedom to think in our own minds and able to become a person with a unique talent of being a miracle of warrior love! What blesses one blesses all! Happiness is sure to come from such creativity. If anyone wants you to conform, just send him or her love and go on along your very own path of loving life.

WARRIOR LOVE published by Balboa Press

Transformation through listening

I love saying, “Today I will meet the right people and radiate love wherever I go.”

On the coach coming over the mountains, I listened to a young woman named Julie. She told me her story. She was a frustrated German business student, and had come to Crete years ago as a child. Julie gradually trusted me and went deep into her past and recounted her relationships and her dreams of doing something worthwhile. Her spirit was heavy, and her words tumbled out like accusations at herself and life. I asked her, “What are your dreams?” She replied, “Wow, very few people ask that question—especially at college!”

Yet, as she sat back, feeling slightly coach sick, she suddenly remembered a dream of being close to the land and growing vegetables and living in a community. I suggested a lovely documentary, One Man, One Cow, One Planet. At the end of the coach journey, she took my card, and I also suggested she read Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life. Then she went on her way with her two German friends. I am not writing about this to blow my own trumpet; it is simply an example of putting love into action. I remember Ole Larson, a teacher at the Institute for Self-Actualization (ISA). He asked me, “Do people leave you feeling better for having met you, or worse?”

Meetings are so wonderful when I embrace the intention just to listen and appreciate. We can all remember, I am sure, special people who have listened to us and given us help just at the right time and in the perfect space sequence. I am blessed with so many people who have loved being with me on my journey. Just listen to the song “Lean on Me” by Bill Withers: “We all need somebody to lean on!” My fingers are tapping to the music. I love how to love life and to be in that stream or flow. And the song ends, “Just call me if you need a friend!”